If I Had A Hammer

This morning the temperature was negative seven degrees. One of the more difficult morning chores I have is bringing water to the chickens. Their rubber bowl freezes solid in this weather.  I have a brick near the side of the house to use as a sharp edge to bang the water bowl against but that brick is buried in the snow. This weekend I got the bright idea to bring a hammer out there. Now I don't mind the water bowl being completely frozen. Now I don't have to bang that bowl around for 5 minutes to get the ice out. Now I just hold it in one hand and use my trusty hammer all around the edges and the bottom and voila! The ice falls out and I can add warm water to it. I wish I had thought of this eight years ago!

Swing Time

I could get more reading done if I spent less time on my forced hobby of shoveling snow but I did  manage to read Swing Time by Zadie Smith. This story is about two girls who grow up near each other in London, the only girls of color in their class. They go to dance class together. One of the girls, Tracey, is a good dancer.  The other girl, the narrator of the story has flat feet and drops out of dancing. Their paths separate as they finish school. The narrator goes on to become a personal assistant of a super star. Some of the story takes place in New York City and some in west Africa. I think the author does a great description of the places in the book.  Friendship, race, and class are recurring themes in the book.

Snow

Today at work I had a late meeting. Snow was falling down heavily. Everyone in the room complained about the weather. The snow banks are so high they can't throw the snow over them. There is no room in the yard to push the snow. Then, just as I had put a swallow of water into my mouth but before I swallowed it a man said (about his son), that "He is the only happy person in Minnesota." Why was that so funny? Written down it doesn't sound as funny as it did when I heard it. I thought it was so funny I did a spit take.  I spit water all over my papers and the table. I swallowed the water, got up, grabbed a napkin, wiped up the mess, and told him, "Quit being so funny!" I was slightly embarrassed.  I don't think I have ever done a spit take before in my life.  All this snow is making me punchy.  By the way, what do you call an old snowman?  

Water.

Paris, He Said

In this novel by Christine Sneed, a struggling artist named Jayne is asked by an older man and art gallery owner if she would like to move to Paris to work there and live with him. They have a romantic relationship. He says he wants her to have the time and space to realize her potential as an artist.  He can see she is barely making it financially in Manhattan. She agrees to this idea. This story is about a man using a woman and vice versa. I liked the description of Paris. I thought the relationship between Jayne and Laurent was not fleshed out as well as it could have been.  I really didn't get a feel for why the two lovers behaved the way they did.

Never Tell A Secret To An Icicle

This month alone 36 inches of snow has fallen down on us.  This has led to a plethora of icicles hanging from the edges of our roofs. Yesterday I was looking out the kitchen window of my father.  The icicles hung down from above and they looked like clear, pointy teeth. I felt like I was Jonah inside the whale only this whale was not a whale at all but a Great White Shark. I have seen icicles larger than my leg.  I have seen icicles larger than a human body. I saw an icicle hanging from a two story house that almost reached the ground.  I drive home and the accumulation effect of seeing so many icicles makes me think the roof of each house is a large white upper lip and the icicles are sharp cold teeth. I read once that an icicle makes the ultimate murder weapon because the evidence melts away.  All these icicles are getting to me. So you know what they say, never tell a secret to an icicle. Why?  Because they break under pressure.

Bell Museum

Today Offspring #2 led me and a couple other folk to the new and improved Bell Museum.  I was anxious to see if my favorite dioramas were moved from the old museum. The new building is large and roomy. I liked the art deco style of the old museum though more than the expansive space and large windows of this one. I might like it more in the summer though. Seeing the white out conditions outside was not a pleasant sight to my eyes. We walked upstairs first and spent a good hour and a half up there.  I was pleased to see the wood duck diorama was still there. That one was my favorite because I feel like I could walk right into the window and down to the lake. In this diorama the baby ducks are being called out of the nest by their mother. One little wood duck landed on his or her back. The classic wolf diorama at Shovel Point on the North Shore was there. The moose is still there. The elk at Inspiration Peak are still there. The sand hill crane diorama is still there.  The snow goose diorama is still there. I am sure it wasn't easy to move those dioramas. They had to deal with unsafe things like mercury and asbestos in the materials. Added to the museum are interactive computers.  Near the sand hill crane diorama was a screen with a sand hill crane on it.  In front of the screen were two sand hill crane feet outlines. So I stood on the crane feet outlines. The screen told me to imitate the crane.  The crane bowed.  I bowed. The crane flapped the wings.  I flapped my arms. The crane jumped. With  my artificial hips I am not supposed to jump but I jumped anyway. We went through the same three steps again. Then the screen showed me acting like a crane. Now everyone in the room could see me acting like a crane. We all laughed at that image. One of the docents is a man I met with the master naturalist program. I couldn't remember his name but I did talk to him.  He remembered me too. In one area of the upper floor they had a model of a wooly mammoth, a giant beaver and a musk ox. Downstairs they had a touch and see room and we spent 45 minutes in there touching and seeing.  A large exhibit on climate and weather took a large area on the north side of the first floor. I learned a lot today.  I don't remember all of it. But I do remember this. One of the most resilient creatures on this planet is a tardigrade. I had never heard of this microscopic creature that lives on moss. This tiny creature is so tough it can live in the arctic, near a volcano, on mountain tops and in the deep sea.  Known as the water bear this creature survived exposure to space. Look at this photo of a tardigrade.  Tell me you won't have nightmares about this eight legged creature tonight!

Epidaurus

Today, as I was shoveling the driveway AGAIN, I thought about my trip to Greece and the time we went to visit the ancient Greek theater Epidaurus. We had a sunny bright day that day as the bus took us up the winding hill to the theater. We had a long walk from the parking lot.  The WC's were cold.  Only cold water ran in the sinks. The toilets, like many toilets in Greece, were porcelain. That part is fine. The difficulty comes in that they don't use toilet seats. Sitting on a narrow porcelain ridge is very cold. Squatting is also difficult. One solution I used was to put my hands on the porcelain and sit on my hands which is warmer but more germy. I washed my hands thoroughly in the cold water and marched up the hill to the theater. Guards are on duty at these ancient ruins. They sit in little huts, smoking and watching. When they see a visitor do something wrong they blow their whistle.  We walked into the theater.  I walked up a row of seats.  My daughter in law recommended I stand on the circle in the center of the stage and move my feet.  I walked back down the many steps and stood on the circle.  I moved my feet. The sound of the gravel under my feet came back to my and into my ears from what seemed like every direction.  The acoustics were amazing. I danced a few steps just to hear the sound of my feet moving on these ancient marble slabs.  Then I walked back up to the top of the theater to look down. As I was coming down I walked near Offspring #1. I recommended he stand in the circle and listen for the sounds.  He walked to the circle at center stage. To my surprise he began to sing the national anthem of Canada in a strong voice.  "Oh, Canada, our home and native land,"  Tweet!  Tweet! Angry whistles are bleating. Evidently it is against the rules to sing the Canadian national anthem at Epidaurus. Now that was a moment to remember! We were all laughing. Except the whistle blower, I don't think she was laughing.