Finally!

Whenever I visit Offspring #1 he makes tofu for me, or for himself, or for everybody at the table. This, to me, is highly ironic because when I presented meals when he was a teenager, he would ask in a tone of voice that suggested I was offering toxic chemicals, "I suppose there is tofu in this?"   And now he makes tofu for me.  He does it so well!  I visit him. He makes me tofu.  I go home.  I buy tofu.  I try and make it.  The tofu tastes terrible.  I give up on tofu until the next visit. Repeat 8 times.  This time was different. This time I made tofu and it wasn't half bad - crunchy and chewy; totally edible. The taste was improved with some ketchup and mustard.   My recipe includes these ingredients:  1 block extra firm organic tofu from Trader Joe's, 1 tablespoon olive oil, 1 tablespoon soy sauce (except I used ketchup a friend of mine made when she was one whole 30 diet), 1 tablespoon arrowroot powder (except I used cornstarch).  Place your tofu on top of your cheese grater to drain while you cover it with 8 heavy ceramic plates. Go to the gym. Lift weights focusing on biceps, triceps, shoulders, lats and legs.  Walk on the treadmill at a good pace  and a 4.5 incline for 20 minutes. Drive home.  Cut tofu into small uneven chunks.  Aim for even though. Place chunks in bowl. Add oil, ketchup and cornstarch.  Stir until all chunks are covered. Preheat oven t0 400 degrees.  Place parchment paper on a cookie sheet.  When oven is hot spread tofu chunks apart making sure all surfaces are coated.  Bake for 15 minutes.  Turn each chunk.  Taste a chunk but don't be disappointed yet.  Bake another 15 minutes.  Look at tofu.  Give it another 5 minutes at 400 degrees.  Remove from oven. Bazinga!