I'm out of my comfort zone lately because too many strange things have happened. Today I was walking through the lobby at work when a friend gave me "the eye." This friend and I have sat through many meetings together where she would communicate, with her blue eyes, things such as, "I dare you to laugh," or "Can you believe what he just said?" or "That was a bald-faced lie!" or "I didn't see that one coming." And I am able to read and interpret all those blue eyed looks. I am fluent in her blue eyed silent communication. Today the lobby was crowded with people milling about. Some were buying candles that were for sale; others waiting for the elevator. My friend gave me the eye that said, "Look at that girl." So I did look. This young, Caucasian woman with dark shoulder length hair, dressed 
casually in jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt, had a freaking squirrel on her. No leash, no harness, this small gray squirrel was running the length of her arm from neck to fingertips to neck to fingertips. She had her arm extended and her fingers flared while the squirrel nervously ran it's course, tail twitching. My eyes bugged out and I stepped back. I would not have noticed this squirrel if my friend had not given me the eye. People were milling behind me and I couldn't get away as quickly as I wanted to. The squirrel woman was telling people that she could never release this squirrel into the wild again. People were standing there and listening to her. I moved to get away as quickly as I could. I rounded the corner and just about plowed into the building security guard who was going into a room - probably trying to escape the squirrel terror just like me only he was faster. Later I wondered if another security guard would not have hurried into a room to escape but would ask the squirrel lady to take her squirrel OUTSIDE! Pets are not allowed in the Blaine Human Services Building so one would assume wild 
animals are not welcomed as well. I have a problem with squirrels inside buildings. After watching the disaster in Chevy Chase's Christmas movie where a squirrel ruins the holiday, I freak out at squirrels in the house. Once, almost 10 years ago, I came home from work at the end of a long day. One offspring casually mentions there is a squirrel in the house. "What!" I shout, "Where?" They tell me it's downstairs on the brick of the fireplace or at least that is where it was the last time they saw it. "How long has it been here?" I shout. Turns out the squirrel was in the house when they got home from school, several hours ago. "Wouldn't that be a time you would want to call me at work? Don't you consider this an emergency?" They didn't think it was an emergency. I did. I went downstairs and sure enough, a small red squirrel was perched on the fireplace brick. I wasn't sure what to do. I panicked. I called my mother for advice. She said, "I don't know what to do but you'd better get it out before you go to bed." That wasn't helpful. I put the phone down, picked it up again, and dialed 911. I explained my emergency. The central communications operator was extremely helpful. She suggested I take the screen off a window and herd the squirrel out of the house. That made a lot of sense to me and I thanked her kindly. I took a screen off a basement window. I went to the garage and got 2 rakes and 2 shovels. I called the offspring together and a teen aged boy who was visiting at the time, handed out the implements, and we advanced upon the squirrel. When we got close the squirrel got nervous. The closer we got, the more nervous the squirrel became. I am in panic mode and my offspring are amused which only made me panicked and resentful. I think the visiting teen was more freaked out by my panic than the squirrel. The four of us, shoulder to shoulder slowly inch forward with our shovels and rakes. We got within few feet when the squirrel leaps off the brick wall, lands before me, runs between my feet, and scooted into Offspring #1's bedroom. I screamed. I swung my shovel in the air luckily missing everyone. Offspring #1 would not allow this crazy group to go into his sanctuary. He wanted to handle this on his own. We block off the space below his bedroom door with a table. I ran outside to take the screen off his bedroom window. Once I had the screen off, I wanted to watch to make sure the squirrel really did exit. These kids did not know an emergency when it was staring them in the face so I had to see that squirrel exit with my own eyes. So I watch, shifting my weight from leg to leg, wringing my hands, and wait. We hear banging noises. We hear things tumbling around in there. The squirrel is chattering loudly. More banging and tumbling. I see the little red squirrel come flying out that window chattering to beat the band. My panic does not decrease in the least. Now I have the screens off two windows and more squirrels could enter at any moment! I dash around the house returning screens to the window and making sure they are secure. The kids have gone on to their activities in a frustratingly ho-hum manner. I have to lie down on the couch to recover. Forget about making dinner, I got to relax before I have a heart attack. The squirrel, now perched in the black walnut tree, is still chattering and scolding. For the next several weeks, every time I go out the front door, that same squirrel yells at me. I never did figure out how that squirrel got in the house. The fire place doors were shut. The dryer door was shut. It remains a mystery.
casually in jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt, had a freaking squirrel on her. No leash, no harness, this small gray squirrel was running the length of her arm from neck to fingertips to neck to fingertips. She had her arm extended and her fingers flared while the squirrel nervously ran it's course, tail twitching. My eyes bugged out and I stepped back. I would not have noticed this squirrel if my friend had not given me the eye. People were milling behind me and I couldn't get away as quickly as I wanted to. The squirrel woman was telling people that she could never release this squirrel into the wild again. People were standing there and listening to her. I moved to get away as quickly as I could. I rounded the corner and just about plowed into the building security guard who was going into a room - probably trying to escape the squirrel terror just like me only he was faster. Later I wondered if another security guard would not have hurried into a room to escape but would ask the squirrel lady to take her squirrel OUTSIDE! Pets are not allowed in the Blaine Human Services Building so one would assume wild 
animals are not welcomed as well. I have a problem with squirrels inside buildings. After watching the disaster in Chevy Chase's Christmas movie where a squirrel ruins the holiday, I freak out at squirrels in the house. Once, almost 10 years ago, I came home from work at the end of a long day. One offspring casually mentions there is a squirrel in the house. "What!" I shout, "Where?" They tell me it's downstairs on the brick of the fireplace or at least that is where it was the last time they saw it. "How long has it been here?" I shout. Turns out the squirrel was in the house when they got home from school, several hours ago. "Wouldn't that be a time you would want to call me at work? Don't you consider this an emergency?" They didn't think it was an emergency. I did. I went downstairs and sure enough, a small red squirrel was perched on the fireplace brick. I wasn't sure what to do. I panicked. I called my mother for advice. She said, "I don't know what to do but you'd better get it out before you go to bed." That wasn't helpful. I put the phone down, picked it up again, and dialed 911. I explained my emergency. The central communications operator was extremely helpful. She suggested I take the screen off a window and herd the squirrel out of the house. That made a lot of sense to me and I thanked her kindly. I took a screen off a basement window. I went to the garage and got 2 rakes and 2 shovels. I called the offspring together and a teen aged boy who was visiting at the time, handed out the implements, and we advanced upon the squirrel. When we got close the squirrel got nervous. The closer we got, the more nervous the squirrel became. I am in panic mode and my offspring are amused which only made me panicked and resentful. I think the visiting teen was more freaked out by my panic than the squirrel. The four of us, shoulder to shoulder slowly inch forward with our shovels and rakes. We got within few feet when the squirrel leaps off the brick wall, lands before me, runs between my feet, and scooted into Offspring #1's bedroom. I screamed. I swung my shovel in the air luckily missing everyone. Offspring #1 would not allow this crazy group to go into his sanctuary. He wanted to handle this on his own. We block off the space below his bedroom door with a table. I ran outside to take the screen off his bedroom window. Once I had the screen off, I wanted to watch to make sure the squirrel really did exit. These kids did not know an emergency when it was staring them in the face so I had to see that squirrel exit with my own eyes. So I watch, shifting my weight from leg to leg, wringing my hands, and wait. We hear banging noises. We hear things tumbling around in there. The squirrel is chattering loudly. More banging and tumbling. I see the little red squirrel come flying out that window chattering to beat the band. My panic does not decrease in the least. Now I have the screens off two windows and more squirrels could enter at any moment! I dash around the house returning screens to the window and making sure they are secure. The kids have gone on to their activities in a frustratingly ho-hum manner. I have to lie down on the couch to recover. Forget about making dinner, I got to relax before I have a heart attack. The squirrel, now perched in the black walnut tree, is still chattering and scolding. For the next several weeks, every time I go out the front door, that same squirrel yells at me. I never did figure out how that squirrel got in the house. The fire place doors were shut. The dryer door was shut. It remains a mystery. 
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